I call to you

I call to you . In my head I feel pulling towards the shared space where you once did reside . My world pulls to nothing . A thousand words , muted before even leaving my lips . Thoughts that take shape and rot in my mind, sometimes remaining to infect that place for weeks. I want the world to make sense . For all to coalesce in harmony , the hearts that were broken made a new . Sometimes it’s pull is too heavy. A burden my mind makes real, the physical toll drawn from the ether as if from some strange alchemy . Sometimes the clash is so overwhelming I need to physically temper the energy by exercising or playing music . When ones reality is at such odds with what one believes it’s strain can be difficult to bare. I believed you and I were FOREVER bonded . Family. It occurs to me now that the importance of this journey will be shown and that you are Not where I am on that journey , and that our paths may never again cross .That’s ok. My story is grand and already the winds of the universe conspire in my favor . Fate’s sweet whispering excites me for what is to come . I always knew I would have an adventure of a life ! I just pictured you by my side. I pledged an oath to do so, but as I have been relieved of that vow my words echo back . I call to you in my mind , years into the future . When we can again speak as family . When your heart forgives and your mind accepts the past . I have hope when we look down from the mountain upon the footsteps of our journey there will be grace and understanding.